


The Coffin Dance

by violet_sunflowers



Series: Peter Parker: The Gen Z Chronicles [1]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Fluff and Crack, Gen, Generation Z Peter Parker, Humor, Memes, Protective Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:21:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24244180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/violet_sunflowers/pseuds/violet_sunflowers
Summary: An employee is turning the other employees against Tony and Pepper, good thing Peter knows that Astronomia can really help speed along the process
Relationships: Pepper Potts & Original Male Character(s), Peter Parker & Original Male Character(s), Peter Parker & Pepper Potts, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Tony Stark & Original Male Character(s)
Series: Peter Parker: The Gen Z Chronicles [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1749952
Comments: 2
Kudos: 213





	The Coffin Dance

**Author's Note:**

> This series will be updated whenever I'm in the mood. I actually inspired myself with the ending scene of the last chapter of my longer work Throwing Caution to the Wind. It's a series of one shots of Peter using memes, vines, and weird trends to troll the adults in his life. Occasionally Ned and/or MJ will join him. I hope you enjoy. 😁

Peter sat in the living room of the tower scrolling through Instagram. He was waiting for Mr Stark to get out of his meeting. Normally he skipped any meetings on Friday's (or any meetings in general really) but Pepper had walked into the lab looking furious. She wasn't mad at him though, but apparently one of the scientists in that meeting had been very on her nerves. So here Peter sat, alone, with the company of the entire internet.

About an hour later after liking a picture of a cat sleeping with a dog, he heard the elevator ding. He looked up down the hall to see a very frustrated looking Tony Stark.

"Hi Mr Stark" he said cheerfully.

"Hey kid" was the tired reply. 

"How was the meeting" he asked. Clearly it didn't go very well, but he figured that getting Mr Stark to talk about it would help get some of the anger out.

"Honestly, terrible. Patrick Henry, the scientist in charge of the next StarkPhone wants to completely redesign the phone from scratch. And he seems to have convinced the his team the same. It's not a bad idea, but the way he wants to do it will make the phone almost 3 times the price of the current design. We're trying to make things cheaper and more accessible, and he wants the opposite. Usually I would fire him immediately but he has the entire team in board and that makes it hard cause then their going to keep trying to use the design he made" he said his voice rising towards the end.

"That doesn't sound very good" Peter said.

"No, it's not"

"I wish I could fire him and take care of his team, but I can't seem to get them to listen" he said tugging at his hair.

"Can't you just straight up say no" Peter asked, "you are the owner, and Pepper is the CEO."

"Pepper's trying to promote an idea of transparency and having everyone be on one page" he told him.

"Ahhhh"

"It especially doesn't help that his team is younger, like just graduated within the last few years younger" he continued.

"I didn't think you'd have people like that work on the phone" Peter said.

"Normally I wouldn't but this is their trial. Afterwards heads of other departments will want to pick them up for more permanent work. Right now their part of the design team, but depends on the employer reports they could be asked to join more specific and higher positions. We don't normally have an entire team of people working on one project who are still just general scientists, but there was a glitch in the system when the assignments were printed and they were all honours students so we figured we'd let it slide this time" he explained.

"Why don't you let me talk to them" Peter said, an idea already forming in his head.

"This is a company issue kid, nothing that I want you to get involved in" Mr Stark said ruffling his hair.

"Come on, I'm on the younger side, I'm sure I can get them to listen" Peter argued fixing his hair.

"Younger you are, still a baby in fact" he smiling.

Mission accomplished Peter thought when he saw his smile.

"I'm 15. Give me a chance, come on, just one" Peter said almost pleading.

"Fine" Mr Stark said throwing up his hands.

A few days later, he walked into the meeting room wearing a pair of dark jeans and a button down shirt. It was the best May could find in Ben's old things. The thought that it used to belong to his uncle have him a bit of confidence.

"Hi everyone, I'm Peter Parker Mr Stark's personal intern. I'm here cause I heard about you guys having an issue on the design of the next phone" he said a bit nervously.

A few people nodded.

"Listen kid, I don't know why your here since you obviously haven't even finished middle school, but you should get back home so you can finish your homework" said a voice that was obviously Patrick.

"Dr Henry, Peter is here as a guest if Tony's, so you will listen to him and give him the same respect you do when we have other guests, no matter the age" came the stern voice of Pepper.

"As I was saying, the phone. Looking at Stark Industries and the updated manifesto, it aims to bring technology not only to people who can afford it, but to anyone who's interested. And to anyone who needs it. Along with changes to models and using cheaper but equally efficient, to more efficient materials. And most notably, donations to schools in poorer neighborhoods. So the design being proposed is completely going against all that. The materials alone are double the price of the last model. But the way it's required to be assembled will drive the price up an extra third of the current one. And that's not even taking in to account if you want to make a decent profit. Another issue is that you've changed the demographic. Ever since you've gone in a new direction you've grown the 25 and under audience by nearly 60%" he explained flipping through the slides. 

"Furthermore, of you get people younger you're more likely to get lifelong users, and the younger they are, the longer you get a customer" he continued.

The presentation went on with that. He showed different statistics and studies, many of which were conducted after and before Stark Industries. He showed the direct correlation and growth between them. He made sure to throw in subtle digs at the Dr and plenty of times during it he caught one of the team members looking at him with a frown on their face. He got more and more confident as he went on and got excited for the twist he had planned at the end.

"To end this off I believe Mr Stark has some last words" he said once he finishes the second to last slide.

"Thank you Peter for the surprisingly in depth presentation. I do have some exciting news too" he said standing up and walking to the head of the table.

"Dr Patrick Henry, most people would say 'I hate to say this' but it actually makes me happy to say this, but, you're fired" he said looking the man right in the eye.

Patrick looked furious at this and was clearly about to day someone so Peter decided it was a good time to pull out his ace.

"Friday, play Astronomia" he whispered just loud end for her to pick up on.

The familiar upbeat song immediately blared through the speakers. The song was playing through the entire building minus any floors where there might be explosions happening. And security footage would start playing the firing on any available monitors on infinite loop for the next 30 minutes unless someone manually shut it off.

Suddenly the 6 youngest scientist hoisted Dr Henry into their shoulders and started dancing to the beat and carrying him out.

Peter stared at them as they left laughing like he had never laughed before.

"Friday-"

"That footage is currently playing live on all monitors" she said before he even told her anything.

Later he found himself explaining the meme to Mr Stark and Pepper since he conveniently left that part of the plan out. He knew Mr Stark was gonna fire him for turning their own employees against him, but he didn't tell him about the coffin dance part. They both thought it was funny but highly inappropriate.

He didn't even think that the scientists would carry him out like that. The best part was that someone had asked Friday for the video and posted it online. It was going viral. It was the cherry on the icecream sundae.

"I only did it cause he upset you guys so much, you're never like that" he said looking down at his socked feet.

Next thing he knew they were on both sides of him giving him a hug.

"He did kinda deserve that" Mr Stark said.

"Yeah, he kinda did" Pepper agreed.

"Just don't do that again on kid" Mr Stark said. 

"Only if your employees don't ever make Pepper mad again" he said from where he was burried in his mentors shoulder.

He swore he heard Pepper make a noise like she might at a puppy, but he couldn't be sure.

"That's a deal I can stand by" Mr Stark said with a chuckle.

After the hug they ended up watching a movie with some pizza and icecream until Peter fell asleep.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed it, I'm in love with the coffin dance song right now lol. I think next time I'm thinking of having Peter watch Monsters Inc and have him be confused about Mike Wazoski's one eye. Idk lol


End file.
